How To Never Be Boring In Conversation

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Charisma on Command

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Tom Hanks has one of the most captivating personalities in Hollywood. What’s interesting is that his charm has much less to do with what he is saying compared to how he says it.
So in this video, we’re going to break down 4 habits that make everything Tom says more interesting, and how you can use these to ensure that you are never boring in conversation, even if you don’t have super interesting topics to talk about.

0:18 - Habit #1: He uses a story gap.
1:45 - Habit #2: He inhabits the character/action that he is talking about.
4:02 - Habit #3: Tom uses dynamics.
6:02 - Habit #4: Tom includes everyone in the group.
#TomHanks #CharismaOnCommand

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walter neville
walter neville 12 цагийн өмнө
John Steed
John Steed 13 цагийн өмнө
This is kind of funny. I was just thinking about how much Tom Hanks is such a bore the other day. He is a liberal democrat. What a shame.....
Danny W
Danny W 16 цагийн өмнө
After reading a lot of the comments here, no wonder there is confusion. I don't blame the commenters who don't view this as useful in reality. I blame the video. The points made in the video are all valid, but they are lost in the approach. Although I love Tom Hanks (in movies), this entire subject of having interesting conversations could have used different and more varied examples, not just one actor, and especially not focusing so much on his intensity. (He's over the top in these clips.) The education is here, hiding behind Tom, and is distorted by the whole approach to the subject matter. But hey, I clicked on it for Tom Hanks as much as I did for the Title. :)
TheVagolfer 17 цагийн өмнө
Yes, but Tom is an entertainer, he does this for a living. What do " normal " people do ?
Ocean Drop
Ocean Drop 2 өдрийн өмнө
Having conversations with people is the easiest thing in the world. All you have to do is ask questions about the other people and seem interested, most peoples' favorite subject is themselves.
reefprayer resin
reefprayer resin 2 өдрийн өмнө
Spot on! - ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ by Dale Carnegie
TA Margain
TA Margain 2 өдрийн өмнө
you should apply what tom does
Rudy B
Rudy B 3 өдрийн өмнө
Debra Boaze
Debra Boaze 3 өдрийн өмнө
boi mac
boi mac 4 өдрийн өмнө
Now downloading Tom Hanks...
yerb 4 өдрийн өмнө
Great video. Thank you!
Grumpy Old Writer
Grumpy Old Writer 4 өдрийн өмнө
Nice channel thanks!
Alec Vesely
Alec Vesely 4 өдрийн өмнө
Has anyone noticed that Tom is not saying anything important?
99 ddmirror
99 ddmirror 4 өдрийн өмнө
i quickly lost interest in this video when it suggested that Tom Hanks is interesting.
Preben Gjestang
Preben Gjestang 5 өдрийн өмнө
How To Never Be Boring In Conversation - Be famous like Tom Hanks..
peterinbrat 5 өдрийн өмнө
As opposed to the Cliff Claven, "It's a little known fact... " Technique of conversation...
Organic Methamphetamine
Organic Methamphetamine 5 өдрийн өмнө
I don't think it's possible to fake these things, its natural.. genetic
cameriqueTV 5 өдрийн өмнө
This is why southern gentlemen used to start their conversation with "I do declare". It gets attention focused, so that people don't say "what?" causing them to repeat themselves.
Kritikitti 5 өдрийн өмнө
Be intetested in the other person, even if you really aren't.🤗😼
Teclote 6 өдрийн өмнө
The stock photos inserted are irrelevant, unnecessary, contrived and boring.
Kb 6 өдрийн өмнө
Isn't Tom a child puncher?
Julie Hartner
Julie Hartner 6 өдрийн өмнө
I love telling stories and my friends tell me how much they enjoy hearing them. I miss that. 😢
MIR 7 өдрийн өмнө
If I have to think how to make myself more interesting before I speak, I’m already exhausted.
BitchChill 8 өдрийн өмнө
What do I continue to watch these videos? I'll never use the tips they teach me
Harald Schubert
Harald Schubert 8 өдрийн өмнө
Is it necessary that your charisma course is so expensive, while you have so many subscribers on MNpost?
Emilio Torres
Emilio Torres 8 өдрийн өмнө
"How to never be boring" is, unfortunately, a self-serving inward disposition when it comes to dialoguing with others. I would challenge, if people want to be engaging and memorable to others, take 'being memorable' out from among your motivations, engage others under the principles of charity and empathy in order that the 'other' becomes familiar. When others recognise interest 'in them' as opposed to their high praise being sought merely to buffer self-esteem, you 'do' become someone whom they recall -- because your dialogue is hinged on 'caring' about them.
Heinner David Rincón Certuche
Heinner David Rincón Certuche 7 өдрийн өмнө
Dorky Thorpy
Dorky Thorpy 8 өдрийн өмнө
Step 1 - I find this sensationalism annoying. Just tell the damn storey i'll decide how good it is.
Gene Mars
Gene Mars 8 өдрийн өмнө
This is too much information for me to process. I think I'll just stay boring - it takes less effort. Am I boring you? Sorry.
ROTTER 9 өдрийн өмнө
Yes, say "I love children" right Hanks? By the way, where's Kappy?
robert mccully
robert mccully 9 өдрийн өмнө
its all true if you look like tom hanks, sound like tom hanks, smile like tom hanks, have the energy of tom hanks, think like tom hanks. However if you listen closer he is asking questions that say do you want to be involved in my story, if not he will switch on a dime.
jim doe
jim doe 9 өдрийн өмнө
Exagerrating is seen as showing off and turn off
jim doe
jim doe 9 өдрийн өмнө
Life isnt all about shock conversation
Gas_Station Girl
Gas_Station Girl 9 өдрийн өмнө
This seems like stuff that anyone with a decent personality would do innately
metamorphiq 9 өдрийн өмнө
The reaction to any of these examples is "...why should I care what you're babbling about?".
Günther Thomsen
Günther Thomsen 9 өдрийн өмнө
Sounds like you're talking about the future president of the USA.
Dan Lokemoen
Dan Lokemoen 10 өдрийн өмнө
Ham it up, use tricks, and always be "on" or no one will like you. If that's your mindset, happiness will eternally elude you.
xra argu
xra argu 10 өдрийн өмнө
or...speak only when you have something to say that matters, but, start with something slightly off the current topic so people get over the shock that you are speaking and hear what you have to say.
EJGPM 10 өдрийн өмнө
step 1: be Tom Hanks
Allan I.C
Allan I.C 10 өдрийн өмнө
You missed the most important reason he is not seen as boring in the videos you use - he is a movie star. Also, every clip you played is with people who went there to listen to him. I don't know how you think this affects what you are saying in this video but I would be interested to hear your response
jody fresnack
jody fresnack 10 өдрийн өмнө
The safest way to not be boring is to get the people you are with to talk about themselves. After all, that is what everyone is most interested in, of course you will be bored
Carlos Lopez
Carlos Lopez 11 өдрийн өмнө
wILLB Duhnnn
wILLB Duhnnn 11 өдрийн өмнө
Run Forest!
wILLB Duhnnn
wILLB Duhnnn 11 өдрийн өмнө
Tom Hanks: Larry’s brother gets screwed! Wait! How did he get screwed? Isaac Kappy?
Acyuta Atipriya Jambavatidasi
Acyuta Atipriya Jambavatidasi 11 өдрийн өмнө
Maybe you want to find someone who is not a satanist paedophile? Thx! :-)
Robert Hart
Robert Hart 11 өдрийн өмнө
Great conv starter for these puppets How's GITMO?
Ray Wirth
Ray Wirth 11 өдрийн өмнө
is it true he gave up his usa citizenship and left the country
The Quiet Revolution
The Quiet Revolution 12 өдрийн өмнө
(2:17) Why is it when a narrator says _"Most people stay very flat in their faces when they speak..."_ a scene featuring Matthew McConaughey always pops up?!
faithful02u 12 өдрийн өмнө
They’re called actors for a reason and it’s called performing because it’s not real behaviour in the main
watherby29 12 өдрийн өмнө
Rule 1: look good Rule 2: be Tom Hanks
Giorgios Culofakis
Giorgios Culofakis 12 өдрийн өмнө
Pedohank is great!! He uses his charm to lure small boys and girls.
Glicksman1 13 өдрийн өмнө
Tom is a consummate actor and performer. What he has learned and learned well over a lifetime is how to engage a listener/viewer. That's his profession, why we know who he is, and why we enjoy listening to and watching him.
Bridget Menham
Bridget Menham 13 өдрийн өмнө
I do this anyway and Ive stopped hanging around boring people ha ha I wouldn't send this to them cause they were mostly narcsisist and they would be affended .... Who else agrees with what Im saying ???
wally123ish 13 өдрийн өмнө
You can't teach these talents. They are natural and innate to that person. I would think that if you tried to employ these techniques consciously you'd come off as fake or weird.
The Quiet Revolution
The Quiet Revolution 12 өдрийн өмнө
Not at all. It's kinda like walking a tightrope between being Sean Connery or Robin Williams at any given moment. Unpredictability is the key...
Zed 13 өдрийн өмнө
Look how happy he is he clearly loves what he does. Sure he knows how to tell a story but in general people who enjoy their lives are far more fun and interesting to be around than people who don't like the lives they lead.
jill wozhere
jill wozhere 13 өдрийн өмнө
For an introvert on the highest level, this sounds as likely for me to master as becoming a rocket scientist.
ttk100 14 өдрийн өмнө
So, it´s real simple: just be a perfect actor with mimics and being able to shift into any person. thank you!
Tom Thalon
Tom Thalon 14 өдрийн өмнө
So, are you selling your service based on using Tom Hanks as your live examples?
cloudybrain 14 өдрийн өмнө
Whenever I move my hands when I talk, I create vertigo and the listener throws up
kulturfreund66 14 өдрийн өмнө
Tiring video. My suggestion: Make shorter videos.
Martin Kaufmann
Martin Kaufmann 14 өдрийн өмнө
Tom Hanks? I can’t stand him 🙈
Dinorah Darby
Dinorah Darby 14 өдрийн өмнө
Speak from your gut and uninhibited animation. This works if your not on a first date in a restaurant!
Paula Stone
Paula Stone 14 өдрийн өмнө
I have aspergers and i have almost no ability to naturally learn how to socially interact. Ive had to literally study how to behave and now pretty much nobody can tell i have issues with it. These kind of videos are so helpful for improving my social skills, and im sure that its helpful to many others like me. thank you so much!
Rings Circles
Rings Circles 14 өдрийн өмнө
i tried this at the bank to no avail
Fearchar 14 өдрийн өмнө
Is this why so many people from the USA always shout, screech and behave like clowns? Are they learning over-expressive behaviour from videos like this? Many of us in Europe keep well away from grown-up children like this because their company, even if not ill-intentioned, is so wearing.
roflmows 14 өдрийн өмнө
you really shouldn't point at people, though. it's rude and can make nervous people feel more nervous. it's better to just use eye contact. if you want to gesture at someone, do it with your hand open and your palm up. it shows trustworthiness. trump points at people. ever notice how annoying that is? it's like saying "you there, YEAH YOU, i'm singling you out." don't point at people. a lot of us feel like it's passive aggression.
vifko 14 өдрийн өмнө
I don't think Tom is using the explained techniques on purpose. He is just being Tom Hanks
razvigor andreev
razvigor andreev 14 өдрийн өмнө
Watched the video, tried these concepts, but they don't work. Screamed loudly at a stranger in an elevator, then whispered in their ear, followed by sporadic, maniacal laughter...definitely didn't work as in Tom's examples...
Christfollower Love
Christfollower Love 15 өдрийн өмнө
I understand how to use these tips I just don't care or have the energy to engage people. 🤷
Kathy Hix
Kathy Hix 15 өдрийн өмнө
TL;DR: To be as interesting as Tom Hanks, be more like Tom Hanks.
Joe P
Joe P 15 өдрийн өмнө
Just cause Tom Hanks can do it, doesn’t mean I could.
Michael Bisk
Michael Bisk 15 өдрийн өмнө
TH=Total shithead
UnsalCS 15 өдрийн өмнө
Wrong premise : Tom is extremely boring.
sean fagan
sean fagan 15 өдрийн өмнө
Pedophiles are not interesting 🤔
Pierre Van Dick
Pierre Van Dick 15 өдрийн өмнө
When you are THE STAR, whatever WORKS!
T Diddle
T Diddle 15 өдрийн өмнө
It must be difficult to illustrate points when you have to keep your clips under 20 seconds because of the 2012 Digital Rights Management act.
Livon Diramerian
Livon Diramerian 15 өдрийн өмнө
There should be unity to avoid being boring.
robotron17 16 өдрийн өмнө
Tom Hanks' opening line: "What's your name, little guy?"
jon debban
jon debban 16 өдрийн өмнө
i frickin love the jackson clip.
Sylv ana
Sylv ana 16 өдрийн өмнө
The “ No BullSh!t “ opener always leads me to the conclusion that it’s Bullsh!t.
lisa hind
lisa hind 16 өдрийн өмнө
He uses his hands a lot to express himself.
Andy 16 өдрийн өмнө
Great video and like the 3 second rule ~ basically being that if you're talking to a group you gaze at someone for 3- 5 seconds from the left and then the right and from the front to the rear whilst you are talking.This works especially well in a works meeting or when giving a wedding speech. These tecniques and so many others are taught at Toastmasters where members practice public speaking. This is an excellent way to practice and build up social skills in a non judgmental way because all members are trying to improve skills. You then motivate others and improve your confidence considerably allowing you to get better jobs. Membership cost is under £100 per year and Toastmaster clubs are all over the world.
TheJeanean 16 өдрийн өмнө
This is all good and well, but he has these stories prepared. If you don’t actually have stories because you don’t have unique experiences, then what?
giuseppe3010 16 өдрийн өмнө
IF you don't have the personality to be that way, you WON'T be able to be that way! I have an open friendly personality -- I can get into any group of people and "fit in" within one minute-- and it's just my personality !
ChaseTrill 16 өдрийн өмнө
All fascinating stuff that I do subconsciously to keep from being boring but now that I recognize it and see how well Tom Hanks does it I can improve while still not trying too hard.
Rollo Tomassi
Rollo Tomassi 16 өдрийн өмнө
Not being boring is not the same as being interesting. Most people watching this video cannot use these techniques in an effective way because, your not famous. In every scenario, Hanks is the center of the discussion, everyone is interested in Hanks opinions, thoughts and his life and everyone is motivated to become engaged in the discussion and his experiences. That’s not the same for everyday folks. Tom’s suggestions are perfect for Hollywood personalities, be superficial, self centered and a good caricature. In order to accomplish the techniques listed you need to be the center of attention. 1. Tell a story, believe me, unless your Hanks, Streep, or Cruise no one is ever interested in your stories. Unless your stories are relevant to your audience or have some redeeming value of interest, information, knowledge or funny antidote they are boring. 2. Inhabit the character your talking about. What Character will you play today? This has so many risks that it’s pathetic, we don’t play make believe for a living, were in the real world and connect with real people. In this example you could easily end up patronizing someone, offend them, mock them or simply embarrass them. While your intent is to bring life to a conversation it could easily be at someone else’s expense. As opposed to inhabiting yourself, becoming someone else or channeling others is not a recipe for not being boring, in other words don’t be a phony. 3. Using Dynamics is not an acceptable behavior norm in the real world. Oh, it’s great when your independent, financially secure and don’t need to worry about your image with colleagues or a boss. Dynamics is just another way of overly dramatizing the circumstance your in, or as we say in the old country...overacting. Here you run the risk of, again becoming a self centered caricature that seeks attention and approval from others. If your not Hanks or Clooney no one will laugh and you may even be consider you unstable. I get it, there are times you need to be expressive, just recognize the difference. 4. Include others in your conversation. This is the only suggestion that caries some merit. The best way to “NOT BE BORING” is to not make yourself the focus of the conversation. Engage others in the discussion and connect them by asking questions.... about them! We don’t all have familiarity with other because our lives are not on the front page of tabloids and we don’t do late night talk shows. In order to include everyone you need to engage them, and avoid the first three suggestions, nobody cares about your stories, be yourself not a character and don’t your not a movies star so don’t try to play one by being over dramatic in order to be interesting. This whole episode is a perfect metaphor for Hollywood’s elitist attitude toward conformity and ego. This perfectly illustrates “WHAT NOT TO DO” in order to “NOT BE BORING”. Not surprising it’s a Hollywood Story.
RoverIAC 16 өдрийн өмнө
Tom is very captivating but I worry about the children he has captured.
Rollo Tomassi
Rollo Tomassi 16 өдрийн өмнө
Sorry, but this is so boring,
Protechol 16 өдрийн өмнө
Here’s my personal tip. Dont say lol or lmao a bunch. P l e a s e
Justin Bohner
Justin Bohner 16 өдрийн өмнө
I wonder if Tom charmed the little girls on Epstein's plane.
kimperly lopez
kimperly lopez 17 өдрийн өмнө
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Justice Matters
Justice Matters 17 өдрийн өмнө
Your so boring in this conversation.
CALL ME LEADER 17 өдрийн өмнө
that was really great!
Mahesh Gharma
Mahesh Gharma 17 өдрийн өмнө
it's about time and situation. u will learn auto. when to speak or how to listen or entertain ur audience
Mark Martin
Mark Martin 17 өдрийн өмнө
I'll tell you where this is going. We're going to try to out-Tom-Hanks Tom hanks. Then everyone will be like, "Hey, watch this! I'm better than Tom Hanks!" Then we're all caught up in a big Tom Hanks race. And that can only end in M.A.T.H. (Mutually Assured Tom Hanks.)
Shota Toriumi
Shota Toriumi 18 өдрийн өмнө
Am I the only one kinda surprised that this channel treats talk show appearances as normal conversations? This isn't real life lol it's a facade.
SKELETON FIRE 18 өдрийн өмнө
It’s like niggas on the go, you know what I mean?
thevoxdeus 18 өдрийн өмнө
I tried all of these, but the lady at the Wendy's drive-through didn't seem very interested.
Arno Sphere
Arno Sphere 18 өдрийн өмнө
Tom Hanks is the most boring dude in the world.
dennis kämm
dennis kämm 18 өдрийн өмнө
fransboy 18 өдрийн өмнө
Paralysis by analyses! He's on a talk show and he's a celebrity😁
Todd Bellows
Todd Bellows 18 өдрийн өмнө
So, don't be yourself. Train yourself to become an actor.
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