7 Things I Wish I Knew About Dating In My 20s

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Charisma on Command

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There’s no rule book for how to have an incredible relationship. And that means that a lot of us (myself included) make tons of mistakes.
I’m turning 32 on October 5th. And as I look back on the last decade or so, I realize that I’ve done some things wrong. Which is why in this video I want to share with you 7 things I wish I knew in my 20s.

0:31 - #1: People change because of internal motivation.
2:01 - #2: Chemistry is a phase.
2:24 - #3: People who are fundamentally friends have the strongest relationships.
3:49 - #4: Duration is a bad measure of quality.
4:47 - #5: Conversation shouldn't have to change when he/she enters the room.
6:01 - #6: Never give up your friendships because of a relationship.
7:24 - #7: You need to show your work emotionally.
#Dating #CharismaOnCommand

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Trax 2 цагийн өмнө
about number 6...i always was on the opposit side. my friends always disappeared after finding a girlfriend, until they broke up. then my friends would come back like nothing happened. something that always pissed me off. i wish they knew about this
Zara Anne
Zara Anne 5 өдрийн өмнө
we have the same birthday!
Esethu Tsoanyane
Esethu Tsoanyane 13 өдрийн өмнө
6:39 - The realist thing I heard in this video, "I think that we IDEALISE 'Co-Dependents' in our movies and songs today". Too true! (And all this from a guy whose 32 but looks like he's my age - 21. 😂)
Keeley Hassan
Keeley Hassan 24 өдрийн өмнө
I wish I KNEW about dating in my 20s.
A C 26 өдрийн өмнө
about the culturl shock you mentioned I felt it in my bones as an Italian in Australia. Apart from the cuisine... oh god I saw horrors, the experience confirmed my opinion on english speaking countries educations (not so good) and I was puzzled by the fact that english speakers do not use hands in communication, like never! WEe italians are famous for our hand gestures and in facts not moving your hands while chatting/talking/etc is very weird. So everyone was weird until they had to present sth (like in a video or in class): suddently they were moving hands with little to no sense in relation to what they were saying ending up looking goofy to me. Why take up all that space?? that's loud! Taking too much space while gesturing gets you looking like a seller, an upset predicator or someone that has no idea of what is saying but he's desperately trying to prove their point
Loto Vazquez
Loto Vazquez Сарын өмнө
Bro! Your content!!! Super wise and down to earth and applicable!!... And then... Your donation... Super fan of you! I honestly hope we can collaborate in the close enough future. Best to you!
Ral Onyeka
Ral Onyeka Сарын өмнө
Brian Hilst
Brian Hilst Сарын өмнө
Ah we got a Libra Man talking.. I do like listening to your video's
Darius Maurice
Darius Maurice Сарын өмнө
Oh hey happy belated birthday! 2 days late D:
Mariko the Cheetah
Mariko the Cheetah Сарын өмнө
Love based on friendship - YES!
arfiana rs
arfiana rs Сарын өмнө
10 seconds in.. -what? You look 20. Anyway, happy birthday! Hope you’re safe and healthy.
Марина Вострякова
Марина Вострякова 2 сарын өмнө
Спасибо за твой канал на русском языке! Ты помогаешь людям! 🇷🇺❤️
Sophie-Marie Thirsk
Sophie-Marie Thirsk 2 сарын өмнө
His mouth is so huge it looks like he’s been annoying oranged.
Fatm A.
Fatm A. 2 сарын өмнө
Thanks alot man I'm turning 20 in 6 months and I just realized that I want to achieve as many accomplishments as I can in these few months💙
Zed GP
Zed GP 2 сарын өмнө
I'm gonna be 25 in less than a month. Never had a girlfriend. At this point I'm just being bored and am watching all the videos YT recommends
Craig 2 сарын өмнө
“Stay in the same city as them to maintain friendships” *moves to Brazil*
King west
King west 2 сарын өмнө
I just want to date you./..
Kiri Seraph
Kiri Seraph 3 сарын өмнө
You look very young :D
Kah Yau Lim
Kah Yau Lim 3 сарын өмнө
Singles often give the best relationship advices :')
David Ee
David Ee 4 сарын өмнө
5:29 We have no idea how many relationships there are that ARE maintaining with a secret, because they're still secret. But I do agree, you should tell them, simply because it's ethical and the Cheatee deserves better.
AcidDome 4 сарын өмнө
Don't give up relationships for friendships either. Mind you, I'm not talking about just starting a relationship and deciding not to take it further because your friends don't approve. That's different. I'm talking about leaving a spouse of several years because friends told you to. Soulmates trump best friends everytime or it isn't real love to begin with.
Serpiente anónima
Serpiente anónima 4 сарын өмнө
If you were 26 and never dated a girl yet, how would you feel? Would you be worry?
Chris S
Chris S 4 сарын өмнө
I thought you were in your 20s 😅
Shubham Patil A-30
Shubham Patil A-30 4 сарын өмнө
when you said "If you cut your friends out , you will suffer" Everyone felt that
IPunk alias Purnomo
IPunk alias Purnomo 4 сарын өмнө
I see.. the main reason my relationship always broke wae number 7 😣
YENVI 4 сарын өмнө
nope stop lying ur definitely 22
Max 4 сарын өмнө
That feeling when you want to put a like, but you already did it. Twice
Roshni. S
Roshni. S 5 сарын өмнө
To be honest I feel like the last point also applies to literally EVERY romance movie I have ever seen😂 In every one of those movies there is a misunderstanding because they don't explain themselves (unless it involves infidelity) Also AMAZING video!!!! All these pains just make SO MUCH SENSE!! And to think we all make such silly mistakes😂
Around elnido
Around elnido 5 сарын өмнө
I wish i know it when i was young😭
J Jameson
J Jameson 5 сарын өмнө
never dated in my 20s, just prostitutes, maybe this will come in handy for my 30s
Joseph Kusmer
Joseph Kusmer 5 сарын өмнө
Geez this dude has aged so well, I would’ve believed he was still 25 if you told me with a straight face.
Wind Ward
Wind Ward 5 сарын өмнө
Honest and interesting video. To me without a deep Emotional Connection between the man and the woman, you will not be friends after being intimate. It takes time and togetherness to become friends. It does take time and common experiences to understand a person's true self. #7 is interesting in how it is represented. I think what should be said is that in communication with women you have to understand it is Emotionally (Empathy) based. Look for the underlying emotional message, and if not apparent ask what she is feeling. Work on the meaning together before providing any solution, if you offer any at all. Being present and attuned to her emotions as a way to communication is what is important. Always take time in finding aspects of her state of mind (Emotions), be understand and allow her to arrive at what she is completely trying to say.
FabTech 5 сарын өмнө
I have a crush on my classmate I'm nerdy one but kinda cool and she kinda wanna keep our relationship secret that even I shouldn't know she likes me. she is a little taller than me. friends say leave her she's not for u. but I'm stuck, I can't forget her. I want some kinda relationship with her and she have a fake boyfriend too. I know this is crazy but I love her. I don't know what to do?
FabTech 5 сарын өмнө
'date by vote' man who do that
Alexander Anisimov
Alexander Anisimov 5 сарын өмнө
Thank you, i can so relate. We probably all had lots of pitfalls in that
Frost D.H
Frost D.H 5 сарын өмнө
soo yr saying 2020 33 looking like this omfg
x z
x z 5 сарын өмнө
don't tell if you cheat. Seriously.
A'sa Dickens
A'sa Dickens 5 сарын өмнө
We have the same birthday \o/
Quinten De Bruin
Quinten De Bruin 5 сарын өмнө
This guy is 32?! Thought this was just a college student.
Micha Sengotta
Micha Sengotta 5 сарын өмнө
I don't think internal motivation is strong enough to change habits most of the time. You need to change the environment of people and literally condition them if you want any sort of change. Also happiness isn't the best measure of the quality of a relationship either, because you should be happy without them as well. This is a technicallity, but I would say a better measure is relationship satisfaction.
Jasha 5 сарын өмнө
I'd phrase it "infatuation is a phase" rather than "chemistry is a phase". It's a little clearer imo
Wilber Severns
Wilber Severns 5 сарын өмнө
Does Episoketren System really help to improve your soccer technique? We have read a lot of good stuff about this popular training course.
Andrew Komaniecki
Andrew Komaniecki 5 сарын өмнө
Why does it matter? I'll never be accepted anyway
Mike Gibson
Mike Gibson 5 сарын өмнө
Hi there, have you considered Troplusfix Dating Secrets yet? Simply do a search engine search. On there you'll find an awesome tips about how exactly you can get laid by hot girl. Why not give it a chance? maybe it can work for you too.
The Kickboxing Community
The Kickboxing Community 5 сарын өмнө
Skip to 9:14
mimi maria
mimi maria 5 сарын өмнө
What the f*** he is 32 wowww men he looks 24!!!!😨😨😱😭😭
SHADOWLIKE 5 сарын өмнө
9:10 done
James Miller
James Miller 5 сарын өмнө
Do you do Botox?
Ani rudh
Ani rudh 5 сарын өмнө
Dude i'm 21 and i look 32 and you look 21 and u are 32
Jacob Feldman
Jacob Feldman 5 сарын өмнө
Bruh you preach such Commen Sense,Love it!
Pablo Peraza
Pablo Peraza 5 сарын өмнө
32?!? Boy, I thought you were a teenager
Mesha F
Mesha F 5 сарын өмнө
Ugh I'm 24 and single for the last 2 years and I needed this!!!
ZtrueStile 6 сарын өмнө
You will suffer.
Tana FRJ
Tana FRJ 6 сарын өмнө
I think you are one of those incredible people who truly are here on Earth for a purpose.Whenever I watch your videos you share your life experience with so much honesty, vulnerability and what you teach - charisma😀. Big thanx for doing what you do !
Rachel Well
Rachel Well 6 сарын өмнө
You remind me of Gaz from Geordie Shore 😂😂
Hunter G
Hunter G 6 сарын өмнө
Great advice
Mikaella 6 сарын өмнө
Damn you look good for 32
Michael Lodwich
Michael Lodwich 6 сарын өмнө
Great video. I agree on all of it. Have made many similar observations and had to learn some hard lessons with my ex-husband. But he is history now. I really enjoy how you put it out here so clearly. Thank you for your kindness and best greetings from Germany, Mike.
kenzie chambers
kenzie chambers 6 сарын өмнө
I think duration matters in the case of seeing if your still compatible after infatuation. I agree time isn’t always everything, but I also live in a state where people get married after dating for a month.
The Captain
The Captain 6 сарын өмнө
"dating for 10 years". That's what people call a relationship, lol.
Ted Longe
Ted Longe 6 сарын өмнө
I dont think some one in your situation and experience make you an authority to give advice. It's more opinion than knowledge or advice. This is not ment to be hurtful just a point.
Stoppelstobbe 6 сарын өмнө
Valentin Espinoza Jr.
Valentin Espinoza Jr. 6 сарын өмнө
Dang! 32!?!? Boy you did not age since 21!
N C 6 сарын өмнө
These are all spot on, nice work.
King Douchbag
King Douchbag 6 сарын өмнө
Umm I'm a major simp... But i can never get a girls attention like seriously i need help.. and this video really hlepss
Silvia R.
Silvia R. 6 сарын өмнө
It depends on how you view negotiation. I've been reading Chris Voss' book Never Split the Difference and his approach to negotiation is about empathising with the person's emotional state and learning to understand what makes them tick
Daily Upgrade
Daily Upgrade 6 сарын өмнө
Amazing content !!!
Shining Star
Shining Star 6 сарын өмнө
Jesus loves you. If you repent of your sins and give your life to Him: He will fill you with love, give you happiness in your life, and bless you. The next time that you feel sick or worried or scared, ask Jesus into your heart and your life will get better. Videos will never fill the void inside of you, but Jesus will if you give your life to Him. He will love you, keep you company, and answer your questions. He is real and a lot of the time He will speak to you through your conscience. God is love and everything good comes from Him. Everything good in the world comes from love. Romantic love, familial love, friendship, the love you feel for your hobbies, the love you have for your favorite music, favorite food, favorite movie, etc. All of it comes from God. Without love there is no point to life. It is what we all live for and it is what we were all made for, but the devil tries to ruin everything with fear, stress, worry, etc. Try to get to know God. He is truly worth worshipping.
The Power Moves
The Power Moves 6 сарын өмнө
Wait a second... If you think that one should break up when you're growing differently, why did you get married?
Dave Mueller
Dave Mueller 6 сарын өмнө
Love how this dude stays on topic and gets to the key points ! Great content
Axel 6 сарын өмнө
What vegetable did he eat
Top Floor Inc
Top Floor Inc 6 сарын өмнө
He’s right about duration. Had my heartbroken recently by a girl I thought was the one. We spent 10 amazing months together and then she wanted to leave because she was unhappy. And once my head cleared up after the shock, I realized we were just way too different. But I learned a lot, had a lot of fun, and will always appreciate her having been in my life.
Cricket Hop
Cricket Hop 6 сарын өмнө
According to psychiatrists, it’s NOT chemistry we go for. It’s familiarity.
Crawl Crawl
Crawl Crawl 6 сарын өмнө
That’s so corny to approach a smoker like that. How about come from a place of love. Like I care about your health baby. Hopefully she divorces your friend. He sounds like a control freak.
Crawl Crawl
Crawl Crawl 6 сарын өмнө
I’m a video gamer, I just choose someone and let them lead.
Rave N8
Rave N8 6 сарын өмнө
Happy belated birthday bud!
PickupAlpha 6 сарын өмнө
Not knowing about dating in my early 20's and eventually having a bad breakup, helped me later on become a successful dating coach.
Asher Sotelo
Asher Sotelo 6 сарын өмнө
I appreciate your humbleness and ability to never seem like you’re above your audience!
Even Aarek
Even Aarek 7 сарын өмнө
Goddamn, this guy really fuels my hope for this world.
Лидия Никонова
Лидия Никонова 7 сарын өмнө
I reeally need a man like you
Silva Cleo
Silva Cleo 7 сарын өмнө
Why the hell he dated someone that smokes, for 10 years! if it's a problem for him!?!? Like, I hate cigarettes, too & wouldn't be able to stay with a man that smokes for 10 years!
Francisco Brenes Herrera
Francisco Brenes Herrera 7 сарын өмнө
Hey hey you were in Costa Rica ?? Niceeee 👌🏽
Thea 7 сарын өмнө
Thank you for this. Made me realize a lot of things. I'm 20 years old, currently going through a break up from a 2 year relationship. This whole video made so much sense because it perfectly described my relationship with my ex. Wish i could've handled it differently but well, i'm glad i ended it.
vanessa adriana
vanessa adriana 7 сарын өмнө
great content!
Sam Van Kan
Sam Van Kan 7 сарын өмнө
Hi! I have been semi-binging your videos lately but this one kind of hit home with me, especially point 5. I am only 18 and I don't have much experience with dating yet, but when I look at my grandparents I can easily tell what difference that 5th point makes. My grandparents on my father's side are not happily married, they only act like they are towards the outside world and I always feel like they are hiding so much. Meanwhile my grandparents on my mother's side are probably the most happily married people I know. They cuss and call each other names, but they never have to hide anything from each other and my grandpa frequently talks about how the day he met my grandmother was the best day of his life, and knowing how much of an honest man he is I can tell that he means that :) Thanks for the video and have a great day!
Toe Devourer
Toe Devourer 7 сарын өмнө
Happy bday mi amigo
Jaren Hudson
Jaren Hudson 8 сарын өмнө
JESUS CHRIST ALMIGHTY you took everything I have tried to explain to myself and others and made it into a fairly accurate 7 point video. Where is your cheer button at? This man needs some pennies and dimes.
jarjarlove22 8 сарын өмнө
32? Like the average of your physical + mental age?
Jenny Gross
Jenny Gross 8 сарын өмнө
What is Troplusfix Dating Secrets and how does it work? I hear many people get laid by hot women with this popular dating course.
Vinny Michael
Vinny Michael 8 сарын өмнө
32 😱😱😱😱 bruh you look 28 or so
Vinny Michael
Vinny Michael 8 сарын өмнө
32 😱😱😱😱 bruh you look 28 or so
Vinny Michael
Vinny Michael 8 сарын өмнө
32 😱😱😱😱 bruh you look 28 or so
hellsgate700 8 сарын өмнө
wait you're 73?? bruh i thought you were like 3-4!!
That Guy
That Guy 8 сарын өмнө
MNpost recommended me this as soon as I turned 20 lol what
Gabi Belle
Gabi Belle 8 сарын өмнө
my first thought looking at the thumbnail.... is this guy not still in his 20’s??? bruh
Di8NEY FOREVER 9 сарын өмнө
Actually, chemistry IS essential, not talking about the "butterflies" that may not last forever, but that mutual sense of comfortable belonging.. Without this chemistry, it is not really possible for the relationship to be happy, healthy and lasting...
Jonah ware
Jonah ware 9 сарын өмнө
32?!!!!!!!! Bro you look 20 years old MAX! Now I'm going to watch all your videos differently now that I got that on my mind! 😮😮😮😮😮😮😮
Wase e
Wase e 9 сарын өмнө
Great example for the 3rd tip he gave are Barack and Michelle Obama
Arlinda Mcgee
Arlinda Mcgee 9 сарын өмнө
What is Troplusfix Dating Secrets? We've heard many amazing things about this popular dating course.
grayce domeier
grayce domeier 9 сарын өмнө
We have the same birthday!!
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