How You ACTUALLY Learn

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Charisma on Command

2 жилийн өмнө

Four Emotions for an Amazing First Impression:
How To Be More Self Aware:
Subscribe to Charisma On Command’s MNpost Account:

What I’m about to say sounds pretty ridiculous…
Stop changing people!

I don’t mean stop caring, stop having compassion and turn the other way when people ask for your help.
Quite the contrary.
It’s important to be empathetic, have compassion and help those in need.
However is it NOT your responsibility (and even within your capability) to change people.
They have to be willing to do that themselves.
PD Seminars
Reading (fiction and non-fiction)
Connecting with family of origin
Isolation events (whether a tank or a cabin in the woods)
Vigorous exercise
0:20 - Story #1
2:20 - What People Need To Change
3:10 - Story #2
5:40 - Point #1: It’s Not Your Responsibility To Change People
6:35 - Point #2: Re-Try New Activities/Resources That You Abandoned
7:50 - Point #3: You Are Going To Make Mistakes
9:16 - New Channels Announcement
#CharismaOnCommand #SocialSkills #SelfDevelopment
Language Channels:

Connect With Us Further:
Facebook: charismaoncommand
Instagram: @CharismaOnCommand
Or if you want to see our personal stuff (regular life + playing music):
Instagram: @CharlieHoupert
Instagram: @IamBenAltman

Shorty Careface
Shorty Careface 2 сарын өмнө
In my experience we need these brutal reality checks to set things properly in motion sometimes.
Matt Tucci Music
Matt Tucci Music Жилийн өмнө
How is the resource not the key and the experience the door? I've found that many experiences of mine had not happened because I needed knowledge of what to do in certain situations in order to access further realizations of them.
Anders Hattne
Anders Hattne Жилийн өмнө
When I come out of quorantine, I want y want to start climbing, muay Thai, a part from my daily gym routine. It's tricky make that work, economoically an socially. Life is pretty hard core!
Rujel Жилийн өмнө
You would make a great Joker, good smile, seemingly innocent, nice voice, charismatic.
Chemical Relief
Chemical Relief Жилийн өмнө
Thank you.
Midnight Elf
Midnight Elf Жилийн өмнө
Your conclusions mid-way through the video are so true. Very frustrating when someone you care about doesn't want to change because you don't want them to go through the pain, but it must be accepted.
Midnight Elf
Midnight Elf Жилийн өмнө
I am binging a bit on this channel and I'm so curious how you learned all this stuff... Your delivery of the subject is so eloquent, you seem wiser beyond your years. Very impressive.
Aysiah Examines
Aysiah Examines Жилийн өмнө
I always take away so much from this channel.
None Жилийн өмнө
I feel like he's talking to me in this video. I so needed this! I made a bad decision with someone I liked and even though I knew it wasn't good for me, yet I did it anyway and I was hurt so badly I cried....
Tere Жилийн өмнө
But when the pain is too much that you can't even think straight? What happens there?
Hebin Pun
Hebin Pun Жилийн өмнө
How can I get pain and how much does it costs.
Motivated By Damon
Motivated By Damon Жилийн өмнө
You Made Some Good Points In This Video ... Apreciate It , I'm Also A Motivational Speaker #NewSubscriber
Neozio1976/Dennis Allen
Neozio1976/Dennis Allen Жилийн өмнө
Thank you for this video. I just went through a a situation where I let a friend go. These is very very good info. Thanks!!
Wergrun Жилийн өмнө
I embraced the pain, and now my shoulder impingement evolved into bursitis
Mischa Rowe
Mischa Rowe Жилийн өмнө
We have to break before we can mend.
David Carroll
David Carroll Жилийн өмнө
Thanks for talking about this. How we learn is something I'm endlessly curious about. I think this is a good perspective oh, and also that there is more to it. It's very hard to find good resources talking about how we learn how we develop oh, and things we can do to learn and develop better
Leaviro 2 жилийн өмнө
why is his mouth so big
angelsfan15 2 жилийн өмнө
70-20-10 model is one of most insightful theories on adult learning 70% of learning comes from experience, 20% other people and 10% comes from learning courses.
Buchi Chu
Buchi Chu 2 жилийн өмнө
Wow, more made up stories about terrible women. Sensing a pattern and it isn’t the women. 🙄
Mischa Rowe
Mischa Rowe Жилийн өмнө
I don't see what you're talking about in this video.
Siria Souza
Siria Souza 2 жилийн өмнө
Charlie you're so handsome, I definitely have a crush on you
Siria Souza
Siria Souza 2 жилийн өмнө
Oh thanks, that's sweet of you :)
Thatperformer387 2 жилийн өмнө
Siria Souza I think I gotta say the same thing about you Ms. Souza.
jayz tron
jayz tron 2 жилийн өмнө
Awesome video. Couldn't agree more.
Eli Farrow
Eli Farrow 2 жилийн өмнө
Moral of the story, don't drug people
x.stum 2 жилийн өмнө
Agnes Ngu
Agnes Ngu 2 жилийн өмнө
Wonderful message!
Charisma on Command
Charisma on Command 2 жилийн өмнө
~ Glad you're digging it!
Sunny 2 жилийн өмнө
his story is me literally trying to change my ex..
Nocrii 2 жилийн өмнө
Am I the only one concerned about the obese people story? I think there is a responsibility You take when talking in front of such a big group as Your subscribers are and even if I get the story and agree with it's point, the example could be very harmful by giving acquiescence to all those vicious people that will now feel even more justified and self assured about giving hell to obese people Some guys will now throw shit at them and then say 'but look, Im doing it for their health, even Charisma on Command said that works that way" It's not 100% always possible for somebody to get fit and giving that lash to whip somebody feels just wrong.
Manon Roquette
Manon Roquette 2 жилийн өмнө
What you're saying is very true. Thanks
Birki gts
Birki gts 2 жилийн өмнө
You can lead a horse to water...
Joe Zag
Joe Zag 2 жилийн өмнө
My depression is part of hating myself so deeply that I want the worse for myself
阿董哥的斜杠生活 Evan’s Slash lifestyle
阿董哥的斜杠生活 Evan’s Slash lifestyle 2 жилийн өмнө
How can I speak frequently like u , how to practice
Jewel Robinson
Jewel Robinson 2 жилийн өмнө
i loved this so much
Lisa Marie
Lisa Marie 2 жилийн өмнө
F- orget, what you know about the subject and your own "limitnationess" A- ctive, learn through creation S- tate, information + emotion = long term memory and "all learning is state depended" T- each, learn it to teach it to soemone else + trade your cleverness for bewilderment
Justin Ichikawa
Justin Ichikawa 2 жилийн өмнө
Thank you for this man. Maybe the most meaningful video I’ve watched this year
Jessie Dong
Jessie Dong 2 жилийн өмнө
The way he talks seems kind of distant/unnatuaral o his true self. He'll intentionally slip in a fake smile or a fake chuckle to make him seem positive or whatnot but instead seems rehearsed. One example is at 0:27 where he just randomly yet fakely chuckles as he says the word issue.
Ryan Wheeler
Ryan Wheeler 2 жилийн өмнө
Loved this video man, abstract is great!
Jana Alette van der Walt
Jana Alette van der Walt 2 жилийн өмнө
This reminds me of the book Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. Such a good read. Great videos! Thanks for the insight.
Kevin Park
Kevin Park 2 жилийн өмнө
This is also why warning your little brother and watching him fail is really satisfying. Anyone relate?
Drinking In Space
Drinking In Space 2 жилийн өмнө
8:53 - I really needed to hear this right now. Thank you. Having gratitude for the life lesson is a difficult thing to do, especially when it hurts so much, but you're right. Being grateful for the lesson does help a great deal!
Willem Schellings
Willem Schellings 2 жилийн өмнө
Videos I didn’t know I needed to watch
Captain Johnson
Captain Johnson 2 жилийн өмнө
I want to help the mandarin channel ,I am a Chinese and I lived in US for some time
sunny sun
sunny sun 2 жилийн өмнө
Hi, I can speak mandarin!!
Fantistisch 2 жилийн өмнө
So true, can relate to that - myself and especially working with others.
Indy Uribe
Indy Uribe 2 жилийн өмнө
Thanks for this. I made a mistake recently and this helps me frame my thoughts going forward. To be grateful for the lesson and build from there. This wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t need to learn something, so thank god for that.
Alexandra Viola
Alexandra Viola 2 жилийн өмнө
Experience is so important!
ISRAEL WILLIAMS 2 жилийн өмнө
Sapien 2 жилийн өмнө
Even thought I don't like it this pain therapy worked on me quite often.
Constant Victory
Constant Victory 2 жилийн өмнө
Trying to tell my daughter this with training her dog. The dog trainer she is using has no education in the neuroscience of learning, but I do. I just finished that degree last year. Nothing learns by being rewarded. The reward is simply introduced to implement a deprivation. Nothing on earth learns except by being deprived of something meaningful. The dog doesn’t learn when it receives that tasty meaningful treat/reward. The “learning” occurs when it is deprived of the treat/reward. When it doesn’t exhibit the desired behavior and no reward is earned/provided. The same for humans, The old adage “You learn nothing from winning, but you learn everything from losing” is scientifically proven.
Spinx6 2 жилийн өмнө
Dave Chappelle is very chrismatic and a great story teller if you're looking for a suggestion try using him
Shams The Producer
Shams The Producer 2 жилийн өмнө
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS!! 100% useful. Speaks so much to me right now on a personal level. Been trying to help my girl through some stuff, but you are so right! I need to let her experience the "pain" for herself, my job is just to offer support and resource whenever she needs it. #givethanks #blessup
fclp67 2 жилийн өмнө
Hey Charlie I think telling them a story about the consequences of a choice (a story that moves them like when you see a movie about prison you never want to commit a crime or when you see a commercial about people getting hit by cars) will be enough of a caution that they will want to listen to things that can help them not make that mistake.
Sean Wooten
Sean Wooten 2 жилийн өмнө
“The Talent Code” - will change your life
Firefly 2 жилийн өмнө
This couldn't be more true. This channel has a great community and vibe. Props
Successful Failure
Successful Failure 2 жилийн өмнө
What about people who haven't been through pain, what would you recommend for those to obtain that key
sebastian calle mesa
sebastian calle mesa 2 жилийн өмнө
"I've drugged people to a seminar"
Talaya François
Talaya François 2 жилийн өмнө
People need consequence to change
Φιλομνημίδης 2 жилийн өмнө
Amazing video. Thank you Charlie!
Buddy Boerkoel
Buddy Boerkoel 2 жилийн өмнө
Thanks for the great pointers about mistakes, pain & why they are so valuable.
Ludmor 2 жилийн өмнө
If I don't seem to be able to change for repeating the mistake for more than a year now, again and again... does that mean it's not hurting enough? Asking after crying 2 hours straight today.
Balala 2 жилийн өмнө
This is so true. I'm still waiting for the moment, where my procrastination gets out of hand, and I mess up big time. Still hasn't yet, and therefore I will continue procrastinating more and more...
Jack Smith
Jack Smith 2 жилийн өмнө
Good information Thanks
SchoolVideosGoHere 2 жилийн өмнө
Борис Обыкновенный, 1шт
Борис Обыкновенный, 1шт 2 жилийн өмнө
I go here from russian chanel and i think that it is a nice idea to learn English with you
Sam Ealey
Sam Ealey 2 жилийн өмнө
So i made my first compliment to the woman i fancy in the workplace. She was surprised and said 'thanks that's a great compliment.' But I've had no reaction, did she forget my compliment? Do i remind her about it next time i see her? I really want this compliment to stay on her mind!
Dhruv Singhal
Dhruv Singhal 2 жилийн өмнө
Heyy are doing amazing work..if you could also write a book of all this knowledge of yours it would be so much helpful for many people because some people like books more and i believe that you can definitely write an amazing work..please do it if its possible for you.. Hi five from india..!!
Derwer Werwer
Derwer Werwer 2 жилийн өмнө
Hello, Charlie. I am your subscriber of Russia ( sorry for my English) I like your channel and I wanted see analysis of charisma ragnar lothbrok TV series (Vikings) thank you in advance
Jeff Doe
Jeff Doe 2 жилийн өмнө
Best to cut out the middle man
odgnj5 2 жилийн өмнө
Sorry, I'm obese and I am self-inflicting pain every day. Pain isn't always the answer especially when people use their addiction to avoid pain and can push people to suicide. Pain is the result of larger underlying problems. Pain needs hope, desperation, and inspiration to make a change. Instead of admitting you were too incompetent to convince your friend to make a change, you sooth your ego to say nothing can be done. I wouldn't take it so hard though convincing people takes a highly skilled communicator and a lot of effort. Not many people can afford to do that.
Standing 4
Standing 4 2 жилийн өмнө
This is so damn true it’s always when your at the edge that your willing to change
Konrad Stouffer
Konrad Stouffer 2 жилийн өмнө
Can you do a charisma video on Daryl from The Walking Dead? He’s my favorite!
Streetlight15 2 жилийн өмнө
I just discovered your channel but Sir, you have a new subscriber. As you say, pain is a great catalyst for growth. I'm going through an awfully painful breakup and, oh boy, have I learned from this experience. So yes, definitely, embrace pain. It sucks. Big time. But I'm a much better man today thanks to this. Thanks for your video!
Karina Maria Piotrowska
Karina Maria Piotrowska 2 жилийн өмнө
I love your videos! I'm really trying to incorporate some of your tips into my life :))
bmxion 2 жилийн өмнө
So what would the top, lets say top 20 experiences everybody should go through to be able to Actually Learn the top 20 most valuable teachings of all time?
Rohollah Azizi
Rohollah Azizi 2 жилийн өмнө
I hope we could have a Farsi channel too.
Benjamin Salin
Benjamin Salin 2 жилийн өмнө
Hey Charlie, just wanted to say thank you for this video and all the work that you're putting into this channel. I'm going through some difficult things right now and this video really resonated with me and helped me get perspective on things. Nice work man.
54M DIGITAL RADIO 2 жилийн өмнө
I wish to do your seminars - Guide me brother like you always do
54M DIGITAL RADIO 2 жилийн өмнө
Love you man _ go thru so much of what you speak of and you have helped me more than once... and keep doing so - Thankyou - My Name Is Gilbert Warda and I am from ustralia and found you bu accident (or was it?) Thank you again with much gratitude for all that you do to help others
Leah Rose
Leah Rose 2 жилийн өмнө
This was an amazing video! I have so many painful regrets in my life that I beat myself up for and this video helped me to make peace with them. Yes, pain is a necesary ingredient for the transformation of the self #fightclub
Leah Rose
Leah Rose 2 жилийн өмнө
"I've drugged people to these seminars" 😂
I K 2 жилийн өмнө
Please make a video on boldness!
Jose Garcia
Jose Garcia 2 жилийн өмнө
This is how I learned I had to deal with my alcoholism
soridosuneku 2 жилийн өмнө
At 2:32 you been playing Kingdom Hearts? lol kidding, good stuff
Francesca Tighinean
Francesca Tighinean 2 жилийн өмнө
Can you recommend the best self-development seminars that you’ve been to?:)
Andrei Lesan
Andrei Lesan 2 жилийн өмнө
Charlie, what do you think of mbti types ? Are they accurate ? For example , I am am Enfp and i find myself to match this type.
TheToad 2 жилийн өмнө
You could not say it better, really, that you can't force people to learn or talk if there is a conflict, you have to just say your piece and walk away.
Matthew Hayworth
Matthew Hayworth 2 жилийн өмнө
Please, make a movie about Joe Rogan, Alex Jones & Jack Dorsey controversy! I'd love to hear your analysis of their behaviour.
Sarah A
Sarah A 2 жилийн өмнө
BAHB420 2 жилийн өмнө
Brought up money 9 times. What do you think he is most focused on?
Tanishq Bhatia
Tanishq Bhatia 2 жилийн өмнө
Can you also talk about how to actively look for resources that may make you a better person?
Clemence Thibaud
Clemence Thibaud 2 жилийн өмнө
Anyone know a youtube channel, compagny or forum where I can learn to be more charming with my husband? (What I mean by that is to learn to be more funny, better dress, workout, how to use my body language and verbal language to influence the behavior of the other person) I really love what you are doing guys, I'm actually a student on Charisma University, and I'm just looking for something to complete what you teach me, with something a little bit more specific with my situation, to live the best life I can have, with the love of my life.
Nihad Mohammed
Nihad Mohammed 2 жилийн өмнө
Excellent video! Always love your content!
Andy Ortiz
Andy Ortiz 2 жилийн өмнө
Make a video about Dutch Van Der Linde’s charisma from Red Dead Redemption 2
Serge Olabin
Serge Olabin 2 жилийн өмнө
One of the coolest things of Charlie - she is making most of all videos at one try, not parts - that requires some skill in talking. cheers
TechnoBabble 2 жилийн өмнө
I wanted to learn how to handle high voltages, I watched this video and saw that I needed to make mistakes to actually learn... I'm dead now, but I now know not to lick power lines.
RolandMcGruner 2 жилийн өмнө
drug or dragged? i reckon stick with dragged lol. or have you drugged people to seminars??
babada 2 жилийн өмнө
You guys should do a video using Temple Grandin as an example for a future video, I say this because she is arguably the most successful person on the autism spectrum, and I myself having High Functioning autism gave learned quite a few things about social communication myself can tell you she'd be a great person to use as an example as she's a bit of a charismatic type herself, but would help to show other people on the spectrum that they can become pretty proficient at it if they work at it, you also do something using Betty White as an example in a future Video as well.
Jacques Keckle-Berry
Jacques Keckle-Berry 2 жилийн өмнө
TehUltimateSnake 2 жилийн өмнө
I couldn't relate more to this video. My younger sibling has been going through a lot of problems. Same problems I went through when I was his age. I empathized with him and knew everything he was going through but It was like talking to a brick wall almost. I linked him to a few of your videos and jordan peterson videos but to no avail.
Lawrence Kirtiadi
Lawrence Kirtiadi 2 жилийн өмнө
thank you
Nicole C
Nicole C 2 жилийн өмнө
This has been INSANELY useful, to the point I actually want to cry haha Thank you, so so much for making this 😊
salim albitar
salim albitar 2 жилийн өмнө
The video was awesome.. like *always* And You know.. that many sources says that from movies like whiplash, tv series like the epic last episode of season 1 in west world Or songs like believer by imagine dragons/ per aspera ad astra by haggard (Which is a Latin proverb that literally means: through difficulties to the stars!) And I'm a believer of that.. But, sometimes.. I just hope there's another way for us (my self included) to start acting before we're ready.. before we're forced to act!
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